Years ago, someone should have forced Hillary to clean up her potentially disastrous choice of email servers. But that didn’t happen. Now, I wonder how many people, who are glued to every word uttered by the candidates, are thinking about Huma Abedin, Anthony Weiner’s estranged wife and Hillary Clinton’s confidential aide.

Unless you avoid salacious scandals about politicians in the papers, you know about Anthony Weiner’s issues. However, I never read a newspaper report that said               “Huma Abedin should have known about him.” Now, I wonder though, when a few emails have surfaced that appear to have been connected to Weiner, if some people will think, “She should have known and dumped him after his first sexting scandal and not given him a second chance.”

Abedin waited until this past August, after another lewd message was found, to separate from her husband. It would have been impossible for her to know he would make this second catastrophic choice, for she couldn’t foresee what he would do in the future.

Nobody knows what goes on in a marriage, what the level of love is, what the degree of trust is, what the commitment to the union is. I believe that if married people had to respond to such a question, it would be difficult to know for sure, for everyone. And it could vary, year by year, week by week – even day by day.

No one I knew ever said to me that I should have known what my husband would do after his arrest in 2003 for allegedly touching a seventh grade girl in his art class. I defended him vehemently. Not once did I doubt his denial. So positive he was innocent, I even imagined scenarios where the two girls concocted a story about him because they were bored. Today, I still believe some such situation very well was true. Nobody knows but Paul and these girls. Never would I have thrown him out at that point. I was too loyal, perhaps steadfast to a fault.

I never heard anyone say that I should have known what he was doing when he was arrested for possession of child pornography. I had kind and supportive friends.  Perhaps a few of them wondered, but seeing my loyalty to him early on, said nothing.

The Feds weren’t so reticent. They couldn’t figure out how I didn’t know what my husband had been doing. After all, we lived in the same house. How could I not have known? They bombarded me with questions and threats and didn’t believe me when I vehemently denied knowing anything about pornography.

Perhaps Abedin wasn’t aware either. She may have been just as blindsided as I was. It’s not something he’d be doing with her sitting by his side. I’m sure he was alone – just as Paul was when he sat at his desk and received photos of little girls and then saved them on the thousand CDs he hid in the dungeon that was the basement.

It isn’t Abedin’s fault that Clinton used her own server or that Abedin’s marriage broke up as a result of her husband’s rash behavior. It isn’t my fault that my husband broke the law in all the ways he did and I didn’t know what he was doing. Poor communication, an unwillingness to improve it and me working long hours provided a scenario for separate lives.

My situation occurred in the past. Abedin’s is current. I hope that people are kind to her, the way my family and church friends were to me.